February 2012
hhhoooollly i feel so sick. someonemakeitbetter.
Me when I go out: I should've stayed home
Me when I stay home: I should've gone out
Me when i'm around people: I want to be alone
Me when i'm alone: I want to be around people.
I had this dream last night
And in it the director of the hunger games movie decided to cast Kristen stewart as katniss instead of Jennifer Lawrence. And I was so angry cause I thought Kstew would just completely mess up the movie. And now I keep thinking it’s real and continue getting angry about it until I remember it was just a dream.
I don't want time to continue.
I have to pick my courses for my last year of high school this week. I don’t want it to end and picking my courses makes it seem so much more real. Ten years ago I imagined myself far more differently than how I am now. I’m not ready, I mean, I still feel so young and inexperienced with life. It gives me anxiety attacks and nausea.
oh i see how it is
bears can hibernate and it’s a “part of nature”
but when i do it’s “creepy” and “antisocial”
I want to go back to 2 years ago
The things I would do to go back then and freeze it for a while longer. I hate myself for doubting people when they say to make your childhood last. I thought things would be so much easier when I grew older but it’s so hard and cruel and scary.